Adopted Woman Finally Uncovers The Truth About Her Birth Family
It's natural to explore your heritage, but what do you do when you don't like the story of your past? Sarah-Jayne King learned about her past the hard way, and it would take years to put the pieces together — so much of what she'd been told was a lie. Sarah-Jayne tried not to crumble under the pressure, as it was the only way to find out who she truly was.
On The Surface
For as long as she could remember, Sarah-Jayne knew she didn't belong. Her adoptive parents were upfront about the fact that she was adopted in 1980. Though that was fairly obvious given she was a black girl raised by two white parents.
Born Different
Growing up as one of the few Black people in a white, middle-class town in Surrey, England, Sarah-Jayne struggled to feel at home. The otherness she naturally felt was made worse by how people around her treated her, never letting her forget she was different.
Being Black
Some would stare from afar and judge, while others would invade her privacy, touching her hair without her permission. All these daily attacks led the young girl to the unfortunate philosophy that being Black was a bad thing to be. She withdrew and began to fantasize about the life she could have had.
Not Enough
Sarah-Jayne's parents, Malcolm and Angela, meant to create a great life for her and her adoptive brother, who was also black. Without any experience or help from someone who understood, they couldn't help either of their children with the problems they faced. They couldn't protect them from harm.
Needing To Know
Sarah-Jayne fell into a deep depression. Aside from her adopted family doing what they could, there was one other silver lining that kept her going: learning the truth of her biological parents. It was an unspoken secret she had to discover herself.
Looking For Truth
Her adoptive parents wouldn't tell her anything about her real parents beyond the fact that they thought she came from South Africa, and Sarah-Jayne had to know why. When no one was around, she looked through her adoptive parents' belongings, hoping to find a clue. What she did find, she wasn't ready for.
From Mom
Sarah-Jayne uncovered a letter that was addressed to her from a year after she was born. The lost and confused Sarah-Jayne was so eager to understand who she was, but the words written in the letter didn't bring her any peace.
Start Of The Past
It was written by her biological mother, who explained the whole story of where Sarah-Jayne came from and why she was adopted. Her story began not too far from where Sarah-Jayne was living — in a University in England.
Finding The One
Sarah-Jayne's birth mother was attending University when she met the love of her life, a white man from South Africa. She fell deeply in love with him, to the point that she took a big leap and moved to South Africa when he had to leave the UK. She thought she'd be happy. She was wrong.
Unhappy Wife, Unhappy Life
The English woman found that her life with her new husband was not what she hoped it would be, but she found comfort in the embrace of another man — one who was Black. Besides threatening her marriage, the affair was also illegal. The government would never allow them to have a future together.
Prejudice Pressure
At this time in history, South Africa was under apartheid, enforcing segregationist policies that were racist against any non-white citizens. Sarah-Jayne's mother and her husband were fine since they were both white, but the man she had an affair with was black.
Romance On The Edge
The interracial lovers knew what they were doing would only get them into more trouble, but that didn't end stop them from meeting. if she wasn't in hot enough water already, Sarah-Jayne's mother soon found out that she was pregnant. The question was, who was the father?
It's A Baby!
She desperately hoped her baby would be white to avoid persecution that ran rampant in South Africa. When the infant was born, she was named not Sarah-Jayne, but Karoline. Her skin was the more acceptable ivory tone, but that would soon change.
The Big Plan
The newborn's skin began to darken, revealing the truth about her parentage. Her mother's husband was furious, of course, but the couple and their doctor devised a plan to give away the baby to a family far from South Africa. Luckily, they found a couple right away back in England.
The Truth Hurts
Sarah-Jayne was distraught to learn about the tragic story. The girl felt more rejected than ever before, hurt that her own mother wanted to be rid of her. Apparently, the callous woman even told her friends and family that her baby had died. The truth was too much for Sarah-Jayne to bear, and she spiraled into an even worse state.
Spiralling
At the age of 13, Sarah-Jayne overdosed, and for the next 13 years continued to struggle with her mental health issues. She recalled, "I felt this feeling of how dreadful must one be as a person that the one person on Earth who is supposed to love you, and care for you, and nurture you no matter what, was able to do what my biological mother had done, which was to give away her child."
Building Up
In spite of that pain, she soldiered on. Sarah-Jayne made it to University, studying law. Around this time, she took the dive and reached out to her birth mom. She wasn't trying to build a relationship, but did want to know as much as she could.
Wanting To Know
Her head was filled with little questions like "Where do I get my smile from?" and "Why do my interests lead here?" More importantly, she wanted to know who her real father was. She reached out to her biological mother, but the response was less than inspiring.
Mother Doesn't Know Best
A letter was sent back to Sarah-Jayne from her mom, stating, "You’re the worst mistake I ever made. Do not contact me again.” It was another heartbreaking moment, but Sarah-Jayne would not back down and wanted answers. Who was her real father?
Pushing For Truth
Her birth mother responded back again, saying she'd answer any questions, but that would be it. That's all that Sarah-Jayne wanted, and when she received information on her medical history and her father, the pieces of her life started to gradually fall into place.
Piecing The Jigsaw
Finding her father would be no easy feat, but she was out to reclaim her identity. She had the courts erase "Karoline" from her birth certificate and changed her name to Sara-Jayne for good. When she traveled to her original home country of South Africa, she felt reborn. It hit her: "I've been here before, and I belong."
A Pretty Family Picture
One step off the plane and it became clear this was her home. Soon she connected with her birth father, who in sharp contrast to her mother, really seemed to care for her and made her feel at home. That bond compelled her to take his surname, Makwala. The specter of Karoline was finally behind her, but the true story of Sarah-Jayne Makwala King was just beginning.
A Fresh Start
Eventually, Makwala King moved to South Africa, where she embarked on a flourishing career as a radio host. All the pieces finally fit together. She shared her story with captivated listeners, many of whom also had complicated family backgrounds.
The Secret’s Out
Sarah-Jayne urged others to dig into their family histories, though some actually regretted it. "The truth sometimes doesn't need to be known," Neil Schwartzman said. He was the other party entangled in a mess created by Jolie’s innocent interest in using 23andMe. Jolie’s family had a secret — one that could no longer be contained.
Adopted
Like Jolie, Neil also used 23andMe to learn more about himself. He was adopted by his parents in 1960, when he was just 10 days old. Growing up in Montreal, he made several attempts to find his bio-mom but came up empty-handed.
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Finding The Answers
Neil loved his adoptive parents and vice versa, but wanted to know more about any hidden quirks in his DNA. "I opted to do what some people might find a little strange: I spit in a test tube and sent it off to California,” he said.
Seeking Information
He also hoped that DNA testing could connect him with potential family members. Something many adopted children wonder is why their biological parents put them up for adoption in the first place. Many never really know; Neil was determined to not be part of that statistic.
Missing Links
This takes us back to Jolie. "I had been doing family history research, genealogy research for a few years and had developed a fairly extensive family tree," she said. Using 23andMe would help fill in some of the missing gaps.
Getting Closer
Jolie uncovered more than she ever could have anticipated. After she received her results, she saw she had a message from another 23andMe user: Neil. It turns out her family tree had a hidden branch.
Relative Matches
See, when you upload your information into the 23andMe database, it shows other people who have taken the test and may be related to you. Normally, you might find a long-lost second cousin. Or, you might find Neil.
We’re Close
Jolie and Neil discovered they had a much closer relationship than that. The two were biological siblings. "Suddenly I press a button and here's my brother,” Jolie said. Neil was elated. Jolie was shocked.
He’s My Brother
The two of them had a lot of catching up to do. They met at a restaurant in San Francisco — the first time they'd ever seen each other in person. Conversation was light and easy, and the two connected.
Emotional Dinner
"I felt an immediate kinship and connection with him," Jolie said. "We look similar. We have similar movements." She invited him to visit her in California. The two talked until the place closed and made plans for another major meeting during Neil’s California visit. Neil had an important question for his mother.
Why?
Why, he wanted to know, was he put up for adoption? Why was it that Jolie was raised by her birth mom, but he, Neil, was given away? The question had gnawed at him since he learned about his sister.
Oakland Reunion
So, later that year, in Oakland, Jolie introduced Neil to his biological mom. Unfortunately, their mom suffered from dementia, which clouded the moment. "It certainly wasn't a typical reunion you see on TV,” Neil said.
Asking The Bestie
But now that Jolie knew she had a secret brother, she, too, felt she was owed her an explanation from her mother. She was scared to ask her mom, so she pulled some details from her mom’s best friend first.
I’m Human
The answer left Neil heartbroken. All he could say after the conversation was, "It was the welcome completion of a quest I had had for 50 years. It confirmed that I wasn't placed on the earth by aliens, that I had a mother."
Sophie’s Choice
The friend confirmed the 23andMe results. When their mom was pregnant with Neil, the friend explained, she was going through a divorce. She already knew she’d be supporting Jolie as a single mom and didn’t think she could also afford to keep Neil.
Hard to Swallow
Swallowing this information was hard for Neil. He had just been... given up. The information cut him deep, and Jolie could tell. They promised to maintain a relationship, but the new information soon became a problem.
Trouble Brewing
Neil returned for another California visit and in return, his family flew to Montreal to see him. Neil’s return to the Pearl household caused tension. There was unresolved trauma, and the Pearls weren’t willing to work through it.
Thanksgiving Drama
"I was an icon for everything that was wrong in that family. It was shocking," Neil said. Things only got worse when the family gathered for Thanksgiving at Neil’s house. His bio-mom became rude and violent, so he kicked her out, angering some of the other Pearls.
Keeping It Inside
Part of the reason for the awkwardness was good old-fashioned embarrassment. She kept Jolie and gave up Neil and no matter how much time passed, this was something he couldn’t come to terms with.
The Wrong Choice
Their mom was never brave enough to share what she did, and her selfishly keeping this secret was a major reason Neil couldn’t successfully integrate with the Pearls. Adoption isn't shameful but keeping one sibling from knowing they have another is always the wrong decision.
Embarrassment
Neil and Jolie haven’t spoken much since their initial reunions. "I think it was part of the embarrassment. It ripped a scab off, the fact that I existed and was given up for adoption in secret," Neil said. Jolie refused to comment. Like mother, like daughter.
Negative Experience
Looking back on his journey, Neil thought the entire experience was negative, but was still pleased to have embarked on his search. By this point, though, there was a second question eating at his brain.
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The Debate
When we talk about adoption, nature versus nurture always lingers in the background. Some say inherited genes play a bigger role than life experiences in determining our health, while others claim the opposite. These two schools of thought have been at odds for decades.
Pro You're Born With It
People that firmly believe that our genetic codes predetermine all human characteristics — without any influence by our outside environments — are called nativists. That means our outcomes are evolutionary, passed down from generations. In the other corner?
Pro Outside Factors
Then there are the people who say human characteristics are shaped by our circumstances. It's our senses and experiences that determine our outcomes. According to empiricists, traits are dependent on factors like where you live, how you behave, or what you do.
Picking Sides Matters
There's the nature genetics people, the nurture environment-based people, and then a third group that believes maybe humans traits are determined by both. Agreeing to a compromise works for most problems, but this debate isn't just for argument's sake. There are real consequences for choosing the wrong side.
Deciding Blame
For parents, nature versus nurture begs the question — how much influence do you have in shaping my children? In general, people are curious about how much of ourselves can be blamed on genetics and how much to blame on our environments.
What Can We Control
Obviously, the jokiness of the blame game isn't the main incentive behind figuring out the puzzle of nature versus nurture. Understanding how much or little is predetermined by genetics or by potentially controllable environmental factors has many critical benefits.
Down With The Disease
There's a glaring advantage of cracking the nature versus nurture code — research, treatment, and prevention for an endless amount of diseases and conditions. If scientists pinpoint a common factor for a terminal illness, then society can work to address it.
Identifying Patterns
For instance, if experts found out an environmental factor, like economic status, resulted in a higher percentage of a specific kind of cancer, then more time, energy, and resources could be funneled into prevention for those at risk. And that's just one of the thousands of potential outcomes.
Wasted Resources
So what are the negative consequences of incorrectly choosing either nature over nurture? Time, energy, and resources are wasted by researching the wrong avenues for worthless solutions. When it comes to solving terminal illnesses and saving lives, scientists need to pinpoint the truth.
The Power of Twins
In order to better understand the hot debates surrounding nature vs. nurture, scientists rely on twins. Twins are great subjects of study due to their matching genetic codes, so observing the effects of environmental impacts is much easier. The studies are fascinating.
Twins Are The Only Option
As Professor Tim Spector of Kings College, London, explained to Smithsonian Magazine, both identical and fraternal twins are crucial candidates for scientific study because, without them, we wouldn’t be capable of natural human experimentation.
50 Years Running
Researcher Beben Benyamin of the University of Queensland said, “Twin studies have been conducted for more than 50 years, but there is still some debate in terms of how much the variation is due to genetic or environmental factors.”
A Huge Amount Of Traits
In recent years, scientists made headway in the research of nature versus nurture like never before. Experts combed through fifty years worth of twin studies, which spanned 17,800 different human traits. In the end, they felt confident they’d found an answer.
The Results
After looking at twin studies from the past half-century, scientists from Queensland Brain Institute and VU University of Amsterdam made a definitive conclusion. When it comes to how much is determined by genetics and how much is shaped by environment factors — there was a tie!
Nature And Nurture
Take the versus out of the equation because both nature and nurture are too important to ignore. Comparing everything from psychiatric disorders to genetic diseases, while some traits are more influenced by genetics and other more by environment, all traits were still sufficiently influenced by both.
When Genetics Combine With Environment
University of Pennsylvania Professor Rebecca Waller gave a good example of how nature and nurture work in conjunction. If a child is born with the right genetic combination to be a good reader, then parents might pick up on that early aptitude and shape the environment to encourage it.
Classical Twin Design
All the studies used fall under the category of classical twin design. That means that the near-matching genetic patterns of identical twins were compared to the only 50% matching genetic codes of fraternal twins. These sorts of studies have one easily identifiable benefit.
Twin COVID Research
If the testing trait, like a disease, is more prevalent in fraternal twins, that indicates a higher environmental risk factor. Every day, twins help scientists solve many of life’s greatest problems, most recently, to learn more about the deadly virus COVID-19.
Space Twins
NASA has observed astronauts and identical twins Scott and Mark Kelly to gauge the long term effects of exposure to space. After Scott returned from a 340-day stint on the International Space Station, the brothers provided body fluid samples and took a series of tests.
Twin Mosquito Mystery
No matter what the scientific subject of study, twins have probably played a major role in it's genetic research, including in the examination of one endlessly annoying problem — mosquitos bites. Scientists are trying to figure out if there's something in our DNA that make us more susceptible.
Too Many Mosquitos
There are 3,500 species of mosquitoes on Earth, which is 3,500 too many. In the U.S. alone, there are 176 unique varieties, according to the American Mosquito Control Association. These pesky swarms are more consequential than most of us realize.
Flying Disease Carriers
Beyond being a nuisance, mosquitos also carry diseases like malaria, which killed 438,000 people in 2015. This is spread by Anopheles mosquitos, or Marsh mosquitos. This genus was named in 1818 by J.W. Meigen.
Dangerous Bugs
Another type, Aedes aegypti (the yellow fever mosquito), carries even more illnesses: dengue fever, the Zika virus, yellow fever, chikungunya, and many other nasty infections. They’re gross.
Blood Meals
“They are very mobile and can move over distances [of] a few miles. [That allows] them to have some trajectory in finding their blood meals and spreading disease in the process,” Dr. Amesh Adalja, infectious disease specialist said.
Finding Their Motivation
Because mosquitos cause so much trouble for humans, scientists have a vested interest in them, specifically in learning more what motivates them to attack certain people. These bloodsucking creatures definitely have a preference when it comes to their victims.
Bite Preferences
“Some [mosquitos] prefer to bite at night when we’re sleeping. Others, those that bite during the day or early evening, have chemicals in their saliva that allow them to bite without us noticing it right away,” CDC insect expert Janet McAllister explained.
They Know
One of the factors that influences mosquito bites is the amount of carbon dioxide in the air. Mosquitos sense these levels, which are influenced by how many people are in the area, since we exhale this chemical compound. There are also personal qualities that they respond to.
Wear Light Clothing
Your clothing could also pique a mosquito’s appetite. The insects are attracted to dark clothing, so goths, please be careful. If you have a penchant for navy or black clothes, try a new color scheme.
You Smell Tasty
Human body odor may also attract mosquitos. Our sweat contains ammonia, lactic acid, and other substances that create a unique smell. The yellow fever mosquito is particularly smell-selective when choosing its victim.
B.O. Protection
Researchers noted that not all body odors are created equal. The types of microbes a person exudes in their sweat could naturally repel the insects. Some people have all the luck, we suppose. But how did they prove it?
Studying The Twins
Scientists tested this theory by studying identical twins. When mosquitos smelled the odors exuded by the twins, they either liked or disliked the smell of both, demonstrating that there may be a genetic component to the smell preference too.
Small Brain, Big Memory
Mosquitos also apparently remember their victims, especially by the amount of heat they radiate. It's hard to say how such tiny bugs could even have the space in their brains to recall this kind of information.
Avoid Beer
There’s also evidence that mosquitos prefer beer drinkers, compared to teetotalers, according to a 2002 study from the American Mosquito Control Association. Mosquitos ruin everything, don’t they? The insects have other targets, too.
Pregnant Targets
Another mosquito-targeted population is pregnant people. While it’s still growing inside of them, it increases their body heat levels and carbon dioxide output. Growing a person is a lot of work.
It’s The Weather
Most recently, a research team discovered that the weather may greatly impact which human populations mosquitos target. This has to do with their reproduction cycle and where they’re mating.
Dry Seasons
These bugs often target populations in areas with dry seasons and high-density populations of people. Some of the most impacted areas are located across Africa, and experts predict over the next 30 years that this trend will only increase in severity.
Changing Preferences
“We don’t know if this will look like more willingness to bite humans, or the evolution of strong preference for humans to the exclusion of other animals,” said Noah Rose, a mosquito expert.
Plan It Now
Though 30 years seems like eons away, time always moves faster than anticipated. Noah is already advocating for a plan to be put in place to alleviate future mosquito problems.
Water Access
“If we make sure that people in these rapidly growing cities have access to safe, clean water,” Noah said. “And we try to make sure there isn’t lots of open standing water in containers, then we can disrupt the ecology of this disease-spreading mosquito.”
Avoiding Mosquitos
If you’re interested in avoiding these carnivorous insects, try to avoid their favorite times of day. They’re the most active in the morning and evening, and spend their time sleeping in the afternoons. Or just lather yourself up with bugspray. Your choice.
The Mosquito Diet
Not all mosquitoes are created equal. Out of the 3,500 different species of mosquitoes, less than 100 go after humans. The rest are on a strict nonhuman diet. It does seem what they lack in numbers, they make up for in tenacity.
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The Itchy Issue
The harm of a mosquito bite is normally benign. For most of us, the itch can be solved by covering our selves in anti-itch lotion and spending the summer indoors. However, there is a chance that the tiny bites can be deadly.
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Mosquito Deaths
Incredibly, the mosquito is the deadliest animal in the world. Recent statistics upgrade the previously annoying pest to a murderous status. About 725,000 people die from mosquito-related illness every year.
Worse Than Sharks
Sharks, which we've been conditioned to fear, are downright adorable compared to mosquitoes, killing less than ten people per year. Some species of mosquitoes spread the lethal illness malaria, which kills over 600,000 people annually.
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We're Outnumbered
Other illnesses spread by mosquitoes include dengue fever and yellow fever. One of the scariest things about the bugs is the difficulty in curbing the population. During peak season, they outnumber humans on Earth. Malaria nets and bug spray can only do so much.
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Bringing Back Dinosaurs
So far, these bug-eyed biters have gone from annoying to deadly. It seems like the only good deed committed via mosquito was bringing back dinosaurs by being preserved in amber for thousands of years, Jurassic Park style. And even that was a double-edged sword.
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The Big Benefit
But on the mosquito manifesto, there are few things to do right behind annoying and murdering humans. In their own way, they are helping to maintain the suffering ecosystem on Earth. Chances are, you've heard about some of our environmental issues.
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Environmental Dangers
Currently our Earth is undergoing some ecological woes. One notable cause revolves around "saving the bees." In order to understand the niche importance of mosquitoes, it helps to have a quick refresher on ecology 101.
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Bee Populations Shrinking
See, habitat loss, beekeeping practices, and malnutrition are just some of the risk factors effecting our bee population today. And what happens if we lose the bees? A lot of really bad things. Namely the loss of crucial crops.
Master Pollinators
Bees are master pollinators, which allows many types of flowers and plants to flourish. You can thank bees for apples, almonds, avocados, pumpkins, and countless other things that rely on bee pollination to grow. Without bees, we would be out some of our favorite foods.
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The Unsung Hero
The thing is, while bees are crazy important, they aren't the only ones pulling some serious ecological weight on the bottom of the food chain. Our foe, mosquitoes, help out quite a bit in the pollination process as well.
Helping Out
That's right. Mosquitoes are active pollinators. They don't just spend their short lives plotting the end of mankind. They are the spindly-legged sidekicks to the crucial work of the bee. The most important part of a mosquito's diet isn't even the blood of its enemies.
Sweet Nectar
Plant sugar, or nectar, is the crucial life force behind mosquitoes. They're always out on the town, or more accurately, the garden, searching for nectar from various flowers and plants. In turn, this makes them pretty effective pollinators.
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Pest Evolution
This might be news, but mosquitoes have been pollinating for centuries. There is evidence of rapid evolution in mosquito populations corresponding with flowering plants. Using vision and smell, they can detect flowers to pollinate. But there is something even more mind blowing about this.
Similar Smells
Scientists have discovered that some of the smells that come from plants are the same smells that come from humans. Researchers believe mosquitoes might've mistaken humans for flowers because of the similar scents, which could explain the origin of mosquitoes sucking blood from humans.
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Misunderstood Mosquitoes
Maybe they aren't inherently evil. They might just be misunderstood, flower-loving creatures who got an accidental taste of blood and couldn't shake the habit over the last couple hundred thousand years. And what's more, in addition to being pals with the bees, they do other helpful things.
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Feeding Plants
Mosquitoes help create biomass when they break down or are eaten and turned into waste. Their decomposing microbes become nutrients for plants. Alaska has about 96 millions pounds of mosquito biomass, helping vegetation grow. But don't feel too guilty about your mosquito misgivings — they aren't saints.
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Insect Enemies
Mosquitoes aren't well liked in the insect community, either. They exploit insects such as ants for their "honey dew," which is plant sugar already processed by the ant. Mosquitoes sniff them out and aren't exactly polite about acquiring the goods.
Ouch!
The mosquito inserts its mouth parts into that of an ant and lays it's antennae on the ant's head. This maneuver causes the ant to regurgitate its honey dew and gives the mosquito a free feast. They probably fly away without so much as a thank you.
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Hidden Details
There is much more to mosquitoes than meets the eye. They have some fundamental flaws that make them no fun at parties, but like bees they play a vital role in our ecosystem. That's why one family was so careful about how they handled their own "bee" problem...
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