He Came Home Carrying a Birthday Invitation. When His Mom Read It, She Broke Down in Tears
The ability to interact with other kids and form friendships is a crucial step in a child’s social development. But for some children it’s just not that easy. And when parents sometimes struggle to understand the difficult world that their child may live in, a helping hand from a thoughtful stranger can bring unexpected hope.
Take Tricia Klein, for example. Klein, 34, is from Brantford, Ontario. She is mother to three children, the youngest of whom is seven-year-old Timothy. And like any young school kid, Timothy gets invited to lots of birthday parties. Even so, for most of his school life the little boy never went to any. Not one.
Speaking to ABC News, Klein described her son as “a very happy and social little guy.” But he struggles. And although he would love to get involved in group activities and make friends among his peers, it’s just not that easy.
In fact, Timothy’s mom began to realize that something was wrong after his first birthday, when the little tot started to show a strong preference for playing all by himself. Soon, he started refusing food. He hated wearing clothes, too, and he wouldn’t interact with his siblings. And then Timothy began making bizarre movements that left his mom totally confused and worried. Writing on her blog, The Book of Timothy, Klein wondered, “Where had my bright and happy boy gone?”
With Timothy’s behavior growing increasingly worrisome, Klein decided to have him checked over by a doctor. Yet even when the doc referred her young son to a pediatrician, she still tried to believe that everything would be okay. The struggle was, however, only just beginning.
Six months later, the doctor delivered his diagnosis and declared Timothy to be autistic. Klein was devastated. Indeed, she told ABC News, “I went through a long period of grieving... this was not the son I expected to have, or the life I expected us to live.”
And yes, at first it was hard. For instance, Timothy would rip off his diapers and relieve himself everywhere. He also threw endless tantrums, and once the cops were even called when he wandered out of an unlocked door. It’s little wonder, then, that Klein was at a loss as to how to cope with Timothy’s behavior.
Klein didn’t know whether to reprimand her son, or to let his behavior slide because it was a symptom of his condition. Thankfully, the stress eased a little when Timothy began seeing a behavioral therapist. And gradually the struggling mom came to see that, as much as possible, it would be best not to make any distinction between her son and her other kids.
Autism can, after all, manifest in different behaviors from person to person. For Timothy, the condition means that he is slow to learn, becomes anxious and stressed in large groups and is ultra-sensitive to light, sound and smell. A sensory overload may, in fact, cause the young child to go into meltdown.
For Klein, the worries started coming thick and fast when Timothy started school. In fact, just getting him to the classroom proved a struggle. This was because the child even needed a harness to keep him in place on the bus, since he would often throw violent tantrums while on board.
Then there was the stress of whether or not the teacher would fully understand Timothy’s condition and how the other kids would respond to him. And, of course, there were the dreaded birthday parties. Because while parties are a time of unbridled joy for most kids, all of the strange sights and sounds would prove highly stressful for little Timothy.
As a matter of course, Timothy had received many party invitations from his classmates. But Klein, fearful of the consequences, declined them all. And she wasn’t just concerned about the likelihood of her son throwing an embarrassing tantrum, either. Klein was also worried that he would steal all the attention on the day, upsetting the birthday girl or boy.
Then, one day after school, Timothy handed his mom an invitation for yet another birthday party. This time, however, instead of Klein tossing the piece of paper aside, she held on to it; indeed, it would change her life forever.
This is because the invitation was accompanied by a handwritten note from the mom of Timothy’s classmate. And it read, “Carter sat beside Timothy at school and he always talks about him. I really hope he can come.”
The note continued, “We are renting a bounce castle that we can attach a small bounce slide at the bottom. We will have water balloons and guns. Maybe Timothy can come earlier if it would be too much with the whole class.”
Klein was incredibly moved by the letter. And it wasn’t just that Timothy had a friend who expressly wanted him to be there. It was how the mystery mom ended the note that made it everything Klein needed to read at that time in her life. Why? Because the mom had written, “Let me know so we can make it work.”
Klein wrote on her blog, “The pessimist in me thought, it will never work, it will be an epic failure just like all of the other times we tried… Instead I decided we needed to try again.” So she said yes.
Yes, Timothy went to the party. And Klein was blown away by how well he was accepted. What’s more, Timothy had fun. Klein hadn’t known Carter’s mom, Ainsley Peikos, before, but just from that one “small but mighty” gesture, the pair became firm friends.
Peikos hadn’t thought twice about inviting Timothy to her son’s birthday. And neither had she realized what her special invite would mean to Klein. She told ABC News, “I love knowing that one note gave her the ability to go on another day.”
“I want only one thing for our kids – for all kids really, and that is inclusion,” Klein said to ABC News. “All they want is to feel included and accepted for who and what they are – that different is okay, it’s just different.”
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