BIOLOGICAL PARENTS LOST IT WHEN THE SURROGATE REFUSED TO HANDOVER THE NEWBORNS TO THEM FOR A WEIRD REASON
It is a beautiful feeling when you get to hold your newborn for the first time. Probably the connection one feels with the little one is so so pure and calming that it is extremely tough to even pen down it in words. It is something which one can only perceive when one gets to experience it first hand.
Unfortunately, not all couples are lucky enough to give birth to their own child-their own blood. And something similar happened to this couple. When they had a tough time conceiving a child, they opted for surrogacy, and surprisingly the surrogate also in the latter half of her pregnancy phase refused to hand over the babies to them. What made the surrogate take such a bold decision? Why did she play so heartlessly with the emotions of this couple?
The Couple
They were high school lovers. The bench partners at school were sure that they would be the future life partners. Even their friends teased them by calling them soulmates. Though back then in school days they always asked their friends to shut, but deep down in their hearts, they knew that they can’t imagine their lives without each other.
Promising A Lifetime
As the years passed the duo couldn’t wait to unite into one soul. In the year 2011, the couple finally tied the knot. To them, it was their love that made their ordinary life, an extraordinary one- a life just like a fairytale. The much in love couple were enjoying the newlywed phase when a year later they decided to plan their family.
A Dream
They both shared a dream-the dream of having their own family. They always wanted to have kids. And now that they were both settled and doing good in life, they knew it was time for them to set this dream into reality. Little did the couple know that it was a dream too harsh to be fulfilled.
Rising Concern
The couple was now worried when they realized that even after trying for several times in the span of last six years, they were not able to conceive a child. They were unsure of the causes. Maybe there was a medical issue with either of them’s health that was preventing them from starting their own family. Thus they visited the doctor only to discover the hidden.
Not Healthy Enough
Life is uncertain and unluckily the couple had to face the uncertainty. While they thought it was easy to bring a life into existence, the gynecologist’s words shattered their dreams. The woman was suffering from fibroids and had scared tissues, which meant that though she was fertile, her uterus was so sensitive to carry a life inside.
Broken Dreams
The couple was shattered and honestly, they had a reason to be. For any couple, how precious of a thing is it to start their own family, is something we all know. And the disease that this woman was suffering from brought everything to the still. Though her husband was supporting her, he too was somewhere broken inside as he too wanted a baby.
Just when their hopes grew thin, they found some light in the dark.
Adoption
The very first option that this couple had was to adopt a baby, and as they were financially strong enough, the legal matters and adoption costs were something they could easily bear. Despite that, they did not go in for adoption as they wanted the baby to be their own one. So the very feasible option they had was surrogacy.
Search For A Surrogate
The couple knew that surrogacy was the only way through which they will be able to give birth to their own baby via the womb of another woman. Their sperms and eggs could be fertilized outside the womb medically and then the fertilized egg could be transplanted in the surrogate’s womb. But the biggest question was from where would they find a trust-worthy surrogate mother for their child?
COTS At Help
The couple reached out to COTS which was a non-profitable organization that helped the childless couples to experience the joy of parenthood by giving birth to their baby via surrogacy. At COTS, the couple met a woman named Margaret. However, none knew then how steep turn would their lives take in the months to follow.
Surrogate Mother
Margaret was a single mother of 42-years old age. She herself had two kids, one being 14-year old and the other being 16 in age. Though she lived a fulfilling life and was happy with her two sons, when she heard the story of the couple who had been trying for a baby since last six years, she couldn’t refuse to help them. She agreed to help the childless couple.
The Meeting
As a part of the procedure at COTS, a meeting was scheduled between the biological parents and the surrogate mother. It was done in an attempt to familiarise the couple and the woman who would be carrying their baby and to sign on some legal documents. The trio also agreed that the couple would pay Margaret $10,000 in installments to meet her expenses.
A Condition
A few days before this meeting was scheduled, a representative from COTS visited Margaret’s place and gave her the option to chose from three couples to whom she would want to be a surrogate. While she chose this couple due to their sad tale, days after the meeting Margaret also puts forward a condition for the couple. What was she up to?
A Friendship
Margaret asked the couple that once she gives birth to their child, she would be allowed access to those kids. She won’t be denied the chance to meet them and also the couple would maintain a friendly tie to her. She thought it would mean that the child will be able to get the love of all three of them. After thinking for a while the couple agreed to this condition, but soon only the alarming bells were ringing…
First Attempt
In the month of December, the very first attempt at transplanting the fertilized egg into Margaret’s womb was made. Luckily the attempt was a success. The couple was overjoyed that finally, they will be stepping into parenthood. But, as a month passed the fetus did not show any signs of growth and the concerned doctors decided to go for a second attempt.
Second Attempt
Initially, the couple was scared, but as they had another fertilized egg, the doctors infused this one into surrogate’s womb. This was done in the month of February. The couple just prayed for the healthy development of their child and had all their hopes to this egg. And as another month passed, the unexpected hit them.
Twins
When Margaret was called for her routine check-up, the trio was baffled by the unexpected. The doctors told them with utter surprise that the egg they infused in the month of December was now showing the signs of growth and the one transplanted in February was also growing. This meant Margaret was carrying a set of twins for the couple. This must have been a piece of exciting news for them, but it did not seem so.
Something Suspicious
Margaret was a little worried. As she was already 42 years in age, she was concerned about her maternal health when it came to giving birth to twins. To be sure of her medical health, she informed COTS about the same. While on the other side, the couple too did not show much excitement. This all and more bothered Margaret. Just then she came to know about something, that changed the destiny of the unborn kids in a second.
A Thought
While discussing her case with the doctor, Margaret asked the expert how would the things be if she decides to terminate one of her babies. Like if it could provide a better future to the other one. It was only a thought that she had and was discussing with the doctor, that at the same moment a representative from COTS informs her about a shocking decision the couple made.
Terminate One
The representative told Margaret that the couple had already made the arrangements for terminating one of her unborn children. This news came shocking to her. She was just thinking about it but was not sure if she actually wanted that or not and such a decision of the couple frightened her. Things were not going as expected and this surrogate mother then took things in her hand.
Annoyed Surrogate
The couple without even discussing their concern with Margaret took this bold decision. And Margaret was not ready to accept it. While she always wanted a friendly relationship with the couple, the duo didn’t seem to do that. They instead of contacting her directly always initiated the conversation through representatives. And with this,things began to ruin.
Bold Statement
While Margaret asked COTS to give her some to think about this decision, the couple would not let her think. It was their baby and they had the sole right to take all the decisions concerned with it. Margaret felt so pressurized and stressed that she made a bold statement, “I am keeping the babies”.
Mother Is A Mother
It was for the first time ever seen that a surrogate mother who had no biological connection to the babies made such a bold statement. She clearly refused to get the baby terminated and decided to raise both the children. As she was the one carrying the children in her womb and would also be giving birth to them she was indeed the “Mother” to these unborn children.
Stopped Installments
In the words of Margaret, things turned disgusting when the couple stopped paying for her bills. As decided beforehand that the couple would give her $10,000 for raising their child, the couple stopped paying her in installments and they only handed her around $600. This was not all yet.
A Spy
Margaret also claims that after her refusal to hand over their babies, the couple hired a professional investigator to spy on her. He would be keeping a check if she had terminated the baby or not and if she was still pregnant. As the couple and Margaret lost all the trust, they did not communicate directly but used COTS’ representatives for the same.
Court Case Filed
The couple filed a court case against the surrogate mother. While Margaret demanded the custody of the children. And in order to win the case, the couple had to prove that Margaret was an unfit mother who could not provide the children with a decent life. She was a patient of depression and could potentially harm the children.
C-Sec Birth
Margaret recalls how during the emergency crisis the couple wasn’t available at the scene. As one of the twins was in a breech position, an instant cesarean section had to be performed and the babies were born prematurely. After a few days when Margaret returned home, she saw the biological father at her doorsteps.
Not A Business Transaction
In the afternoon around 2 PM, the father banged Margaret’s house door. And when she came to see who it was, she was terrified. The father asked the surrogate to hand over his kids to him. It was his babies and he had the right. To that Margaret screamed that it wasn’t any business transaction. She feels used as the parents did not take care of her during the entire phase and now were there to take away the babies.
Not For Sale
The biological father even offers to pay $25,000 to Margaret in return for his kids, but Margaret instantly threw away the money over his face and said that the babies were not for sale. Through the entire pregnancy phase, Margaret developed attachment towards the babies and was now not ready to give them away.
Not An Incubator
Later in an interview when asked why did Margaret keep the babies she said, “When it became clear to me that this couple, who are both professionals, saw this as just a business arrangement, and me as some sort of incubator, I changed my mind and decided to keep the children,”
Needs Time
Currently, the case is under the supervision of the court. The judges are yet to make the decision about the fate of the kids. Even they don’t wish to make a mistake with the parents of the little twins. However, Margaret with her medical reports at hand was able to prove that she is perfectly healthy to bring up the twins.
Visitation Rights
However, the court has granted the biological parents the visitation rights. Every weekend the couple was allowed to take away the babies with them and by Sunday afternoon the kids were handed over again to Margaret. And the surrogate mother was happy with this.
An Agreement
Margaret says that she was happy that the parents got the visitation rights as she herself on the first hand asked for a friendly tie with the couple where she is allowed to visit the kids after giving birth to them. She was happy to share her kids with them but she never wanted to give them away.
Bonding
Margaret, in order to concrete her side of the point even, says that it would be unbearable for her if the twins are taken away. Moreover, she says that her elder teen kids have also developed an attachment with their new set of twin siblings. They are a happy family and they should be let that way only.
Barbaric Call
Margaret says that it would be barbaric if the custody of the babies is not given to her now. As she was completely healthy and financially stable, she can claim them. Moreover, she has given birth to the twins and is their Mother too. Also, when times comes, she is even ready to tell her twins that they have three parents.
A Controversy
The entire case has turned up into a big controversy. A decision could not be made. None can decide who was right in this case. Whether it was the couple who broke the condition that surrogate put forward or was it the surrogate who was claiming an unjustified right over the babies. As of now, the twins are with the surrogate mother and the biological parents are fighting over for their custody.
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